to the injured dinosaur, you probably wont read this but i dont care

I have taped my own mouth,
literally.
Just to stop myself from screaming your name.
I'm letting go.
Screw, fuck all the damn play-it-cool thing.
I dont care anymore.
I know what I just told you would sound so weird right now.
Seeing as we were never that close to tell each other that.
But you won't know about it until you're out and about.
Am I freaking you out?
I dont care if you think I like you.
Cos that's the truth.
I'm just spilling it out.


And no...this tape doesn't hurt me (:

being on the dark side sucks, they dont got cookies.

They lied! Cookie Monster (I cant believe this) lied about the whole thing. You know, when he's on someone's t-shirt and he says, "Come to the dark side. We have cookies."

Well, they dont. I've been there. I think I'm still there. And they still dont got cookies!

Yeah I know I havent been blogging for a while. I lost my phone about two weeks ago. It was heartbreaking. And I dont wana talk about it!

So, anyways, since then, I've been sitting in the dark. I've no idea at all what's going on with my friends in Miri. Specifically, those I text a lot. And it sucks not being able to tell them right on whatever was happening. Dad offered his phone so I could use it. I said no. I'd rather not have a phone at all than to have one and remind myself of what happened to mine.

Shut up, you emo kid. Now let me get to my story. Weird things are striking:
One, she said she likes me =S
Two, I've been biting my tongue a lot xP
Three, something happened to him :(

Lets get to the first topic, shall we? Ok, it was addmath. Screamo was...well, screaming (as always) while we were discussing the answers for the exercises she gave us. She asked the class for their answers. It was chaos in there. I was between Ray and Theresa and they were fussing about something. And then Screamo went, "Phoebe, what is your answer?" I stood up and told her, "I havent finished number 10 yet" and sat back down. She nodded and was saying something. I wasnt listening at all. Theresa turned to me and she was like,
"She likes you."
"What? Who?"
"The teacher"
"What? What did she say?"
"She said, I like you."
Okay, yeah, that was just plain weird. Have she not noticed that I get headaches whenever she's around? And my face doesnt look happy at all? Oh, geez. I need to master these skills.

Number two. I've been biting my tongue a lot. The first time it happened, Ray told me that somebody's bitching about me. I thought it was one of her crazy theories. We tried putting that to test.
Ray: Let's make Michelle bite her tongue. Talk bad about her!
Me: What? Okay. *turns to Michelle* Michelle, you suck!
Ray: No, not to her! Behind her! Talk to me.

We tried saying so many bad things about her. It didnt work, she didnt bite her tongue. Most of the things we said about her...okay, all the things we said didnt make sense at all. I guess that explains why she didnt bite her tongue. Anyhoots! This week, I've bitten my tongue for three times already! You, whoever you are, walking around with your friggin butt talking smack about me, just you wait. You're gonna rott in hell for all my bleeding tongue cares. Only God knows who you are. And He will take action.

Number three. Him. Yeah, him. Whom I almost tried to dismiss. I stopped thinking about him. I thought I was just getting over him. Which doesnt happen often when it comes to me and my crushing-on-a-guy thing. It was on the exact same day I told Ray about this when somebody told me something bad happened to him. Well, this somebody teases me a lot. So it was Chemistry and she calls me by his name. I was sleepy and I stopped thinking about him, right? So I stuck my tongue at her. Then she went, "Oh! I forgot to tell you..." And from then on, I kept worrying about him. I still am! I thought it couldnt be that serious but today I asked her if he was still in the hospital, she said yeah. Whaaaaaaatttt??? Oh, dear, God, please watch over that boy... =(

stupid complications

I think I'm falling once more
maybe not as deep as before
but I want to see you again

Now, tell me one thing
Why, oh, why are you so hard to find?
I hate this part of the world
I hate not knowing everyone

I could search the entire school for you
But I just cant seem to

I hate stupid complications
I wish I could just connect my brain to the internet
Have your face scanned from my memory

And bam!
There you are on my computer screen

But it's just too bad
This world has not gone that far...yet
Would you come find me ?

I found you

I was watching a video of one of my contacts, she was singing on the field of KSL. It made me miss the place so much! And like any other listening moments, I felt like singing too...and posting up a vid. This one was made a month ago (I think). It's not the full song. I suck balls at the second verse. Haha! Sorry x)

Song: I Found You
Artist: Alyssa Bernal (check her out on youtube she's amazing!)

Dont forget to check out Alyssa's channel, http://www.youtube.com/user/hchsknights08?blend=1&ob=4

meet little Castro!

No, this is not about Michael Castro. Well...it does have something to do with him. Very little of him. Okay, only his last name! Damn you..

Daddy got me a puppy last Saturday! :D He's so adorable. Local breed. Daddy thinks he's mixed though. Cos his body size and his paws are a little too big for a local breed. He looks like a cross between a Golden Retriever and a Husky (the lighter shade around his eyes). Oh! And I named him Castro. Derived from Michael Castro, not Jason Castro. Got it?

Castro, after his little bath this afternoon.

He finally responds whenever I call him. For the past few days, he never even turned, look or stopped when I scream "No!". It's so hard to train or teach him tricks. (Yes, I do know how) He's so friggin hyper. I thought he was suffering from A.D.D. for a moment there. But no...he's just a hyper little puppy. What was that disorder Ryan Higa and his friends had? *checks youtube* Oh, screw this. I got distracted... Again. Maybe I'm the one who has A.D.D.

Playing with my squash ball in the kitchen.


The little pup smiiiiles ! xD

I'm so proud of Adam!

Just watch it till the end and you'll see why.

Look out for Simon. (A clue for the doombass.)

In other news, I super glued my fingers today. My Tommy Thumb was the worst. Ehehe. We tried calling Michelle so she would buy me a polish remover and she never picked up the phone! But my fingers survived it all till now. Yes, it's still white.

While the girls were getting the rocket ready for blast off, I was sitting on the grass and sang with my thumbs, "Tommy thumb, Tommy thumb, where are you? Here I am! Here I am! How do you do?" Yes, I had tons of fun! :D

back to kindergarten :D

I didnt have to go to school today since it's Sports Day. Here, when you're not involved, you get to stay home. I am glad! Cos I have such amazing and lovely memories of Sports Days in St. Co, I never want them to be clouded over by my current school's suckynessesssesss. Yes, it sucks that much.

Buuuuuut...I still woke up as early as any other school days. Why? Because I wanted to follow my mom to work! :D

Now, now, dont think nerdy thoughts. I only volunteered because the kindy is having a Go To Swimming Pool Day. Hahaha! Lastnight, I was just telling Helena how badly I wanted to go swimming and hours later my mom told me this. I jumped and told her to bring me along!

We went to the kindergarten. The first kid I met was Damian. Handsome boy. Playful, too. Tried to impress me by sliding around the place. Lol! Adorable! He helped us put the chairs down from the tables. Read the names of his classmates written there.

And then more kids came pouring in with their floats and bags and screams (happy and enthusiastic screams, not the annoying ones). Teachers were gathering the children and checking their bags and...yeah, it was a fuss. The kids were getting bored waiting for everyone to get ready and the bus to come. Serena, Ivy, Celina and Angelyna were sitting in one row and sang, "There was a farmer who had a dog, and Bingo was his name, oh. B-I-N-G-O, B-I-N-G-O...." they repeated it so many thousand times until the younger kids started following them, "B-N-G-O !" Lol! Kids...

What I thought about the girls? Ivy was shy and quiet. But if you look at her books, very smart. Serena's competitive. Angelyna was alright. She talks a lot but not as much as Celina. Calista was funny. If you want a doll sized spastic child? Then, abduct her! Lol! She kept giving me these spastical facial expressions and giggles when I do the same. Yes, Ray and Michelle, I have found a tiny new member for the crew xD

Celina stole a piece of my heart. She was so adorable! That is one smart, agressive, pretty and funny little girl. When we were in the bus, we passed by houses and she shouted, "This is where my house live!" Hahahahaha! xD She was wearing a Nike sandal. Put her foot up on Angelyna's lap and said, "See my shoe! Pink!" Angelyna nodded. My mom said, "Very nice shoes." and Celina pointed at the Nike sign, "See, there's a tick!" (Hahahahaha!) My mom corrected her, "No, it's Nike." Gosh, that girl hurt my tummy! She has a crush on this boy, Samuel and was constantly looking for him when we were in the pool. One time, she went all the way to the other end just to be with him. Didnt even listen when my mom screamed her name.

She kept giving me compliments today. She sat next to me by the poolside when I was asking Serena if she was cold. Then Celina went, "Very nice voice you got."
I turned, "Hmm?" and Celina said, "You got very nice voice." I said "Thank youu" and she smiled and jumped into the pool and went away. Melted me!

When all the kids cleaned up, Serena, Calista and Angelyna were putting on their own clothes. Mom was helping Ivy. Celina was standing there, still wrapped in her blue Transformers towel. Mom gave me her clothes.
Me: Okay, Celina. Clothes! *I was holding her pink panties*
Celina: The brand is on the back, okay?
Me: You gota take this towel off first.
Celina: I'm bringing the towel home, okay?
Me: It's yours, I know, I know. *and I held her panties in front of her feet*
Celina: The brand is at the back, okay?
Me: Like this? Okay. Your...right foot first.

We got that one down. And it was her pants next.
Celina: The writing is at the back, okay?
Me: *I already had her pants on her* Are you sure it's at the back or the front like this?
Celina: *bends down to look at her knees* Yes, like this. The writing on this side.

And then her shirt. That was a lot easier. Except for the part where it got stuck on the top of her head and her face was totally covered. I had to bite my lips to stop myself from laughing. Lmao! After helping her put her shoes on (at the dry area cos she doesnt like it when her shoes get wet), I stood up and she saw my shirt. "Your shirt is very nice." I looked at my shirt and said, "It's a happy bear!" and then she went... "Are you, are you going to be our teacher next month?" Aww! Where did anyone get the ability to ever get mad at this noisy girl? She was too cute!




Celina in the pink robe. Serena with the bottle. Angelyna looking at the floor. Calista, sucking the straw.

Serena was complaining about how wet the ground was.
Serena: Eee. So wet.
My mom: Everybody's wet. Just come down, Serena.

She was getting down and Celina looked at her, "Why so scared of water wan?"

12.15 p.m. Thursday 02.04.09

I seriously, like Michelle kind of serious, need to get my ears checked. Or get a hearing aid! It happened twice today. Words transmitted into my brain were so not the same words that were actually said.

In Chemistry, Alfonso was talking about chemical names. He was listing them all out according to our textbook. And then he said something...
Me: Whoa!
Ray: What?
Me: Did he just say "Moron" ?
Ray: No! It's BORON.

If you think that was crazily transmitted, then you should've been there when this happened.
In PK, the Dragon was asking the girls what we should do for the coming PJ session.
Me: What a pervert!
Ray: What?
Me: Didnt you hear him? He said, "Breast for one day?"
Ray: *laughed at me* Phoby! You stupik girl! He said "Rest" not "Breast". You horny!

10.45 a.m. Thursday 02.04.09

We're having PK right now. Free period! Baha! When the Dragon (we call him that, cos his name sounded like it but it was slightly different and it confused us) came in, I saw him with a cane and I ran to Michelle and I screamed, "He got a rotan! He got a rotan!" and Michelle went, "Oh! He's gona, he's gona, he's gona, he's gona..."

I stared at her. She killed the moment, man..

"He's gona bludgen us to death!"

Few minutes after that, I was concentrating on my drawing. A dead fish! :D And then the Dragon went, "Class, I need your attention."
I said, "You always need attention."

Ray: Dude, you were pretty loud.
Me: What? I was?
Ray: Yeah.
I stared at the Dragon, waiting to see his response. He didnt look pissed or hurt or...at me.
Me: Hey, Ray? Do you think he heard me?
Ray: Nope, class is noisy.
Me: Oh thank God. Cos I didnt want him to hear that.

Yes, this little monkey doesnt want to be given any belacan for saying what she said.